THE TWENTY-NINTH ASSEMBLY, CALLED
“OF WÂSIṬ.”

In a Khân or inn at Wâsiṭ, frequented by many travellers, Al Ḥârith overhears his neighbour in the adjoining room tell his son to go to the market with one person, and come back with another, both of whom he describes in enigmatical and fanciful language. His curiosity being roused, he watches the lad’s exit, and finding that he starts unaccompanied, he feels still more mystified, and, therefore, follows him to the market, where he sees him give in change a loaf against a flint-stone for striking fire. Then the solu­tion of the riddle dawns upon him, and at the same time he is convinced that the originator of this witticism could be none other but Abû Zayd. Hastening back, he finds his surmise confirmed, for the Serûji was sitting in the courtyard of the hostelry, and after a cordial greeting the two friends were soon deeply engaged in familiar conversation. In response to Abû Zayd’s inquiries, Ḥârith tells him that reverses of fortune and the machinations of enemies have forced him to leave his home almost destitute. To help him out of his difficulties, the former proposes to bring about a matri­monial alliance between him and some wealthy people alighted in the Khân, whom he avers to be high-principled, and who would be contented with a dowry of 500 dirhems, a sum which the Prophet used to settle upon his wives and to fix for his daughters as a marriage portion. He promises to undertake the conduct of the transaction, and to crown proceedings by pronouncing at the wedding an address, such as had never been heard before. More eager to listen to this wonderful specimen of oratory, than to set his eyes on the prospective bride, Ḥârith lends himself to the scheme, and Abû Zayd quickly pushes the preliminaries to a satis­factory conclusion, offering himself as security for the 500 dirhems, after which he prepares some sweet-meats for the wedding entertain­ment. At nightfall he assembles all the inhabitants of the Khân in his room, and after having busied himself with the pretence of some astronomical calculations, which brings the guests to the verge of sleep, he delivers at the instigation of the impatient Ḥârith the promised speech, in which he displays the marvellous resources of his rhetorical skill, by repeating the principal heads of the sermon in the preceding Assembly in varied diction and under fresh images, while he moreover surpasses its grammatical artifice by excluding this time even the occasionally dotted Hâ of the feminine termina­tion from it. Then he performs the marriage ceremonies, which he concludes with the usual wish for prosperity and male offspring to the newly married couple, and produces his sweet-meats, urging Ḥârith to hand them round, instead of joining in their consumption, as he had been about to do. Scarcely have the company tasted of the dishes, when they fall senseless to the ground. Ḥârith, terrified, at first thinks that they have been poisoned, but Abû Zayd re­assuringly informs him that he has only drugged them. Then he coolly begins to collect the contents of all the rooms, and carefully selects everything most valuable, to carry off with him. Ḥârith is amazed at this wild freak and frightened at its consequences, but the Serûji tells him, as far as he himself is concerned, that he and his ill-gotten affluence would soon be at a safe distance, and as for his perplexed friend, he had only to feed on the remainder of the dishes and to allow himself to be stripped, when he would not be held responsible for an outrage of which he himself was a victim; or else to join in the flight, offering even to find a new bride for him to wed. In spite of his indignation, Ḥârith banteringly replies, that he had enough with the first one, and would leave someone else welcome to the second; but when Abû Zayd blandly steps forward, to enfold him in a parting embrace, he draws back in dis­gust. Then Abû Zayd breaks forth in one of his exquisite pieces of poetry, in which he tries to justify this and many more similar enormities committed previously by the wickedness of the injured people, winding up with a sincere touch of remorse at his own sin­fulness, which makes him burst out in tears and earnest supplication for forgiveness. Ḥârith softens towards him, and hoping that he may finally meet with the divine pardon, which is held out to the repentant transgressor, he sees him depart with his son; then collecting his own scanty belongings he continues his journey in the direction of Ṭîb, a town midway between Wâsiṭ and the swamps of the Baṭîḥah.

Al Ḥârith, son of Hammâm related: The decree of waning fortune drove me to the country of Wâsiṭ, and I repaired thither without knowing one there who would house me, or owning therein a lodging. Now when I alighted there with the alighting of the fish on the dry land, or of the white hair in the black locks, evil hap and receding luck guided me to a Khân frequented by a jumble from every land, and a medley of travellers, which, on account of the cleanliness of the place, and the civility of its inhabitants, enticed the stranger to make himself at home therein, and made him forget the air of his native country. So I secluded myself in one of its chambers, not paying an excess of rent. Then it was not but the a-twinkling of the eye, or the time to scribble a letter, that I heard my next-door neighbour say to his fellow-dweller in the room—“Rise, my dear son, may thy luck not set, nor thy adversary keep on foot, take with thee the one of full-moon face and of pearly hue, of pure root and tormented body, who was pinched and stretched, imprisoned and released, made to drink and weaned, and pushed into the fire, after he had been slapped. Then career to the market the career of the longing swain, and bring back instead of it the pregnant that impregnates, the spoiler who enriches, the saddener who gladdens, the possessor of a puff that sets on fire, and of a germ that breaks forth in light, of an emission [utterance] that satisfies, and of a gift that profits, who, when he is struck, thunders and lightens, and reveals himself in flames, and who sputters on tinder-rags.” Then, as soon as the throat-bag of the roaring camel had subsided, and nothing was left but the going of him who was to go, there sallied forth a youth with a graceful swagger, and no mate with him. So I saw that it was a tight knot to make game of understandings and to render one eager to enter into the idle fancies [absurdities]. I therefore set out in the track of the youth, to find out the meaning of the speech. Then he ceased not bustling himself with the bustle of sprites, and searching amongst the rows of market shops, until he came at last to a store of flint-stones, and gave their seller a loaf [or cake], receiving from him a fine flint in return. Then I wondered at the sagacity of the sender and the sent one, and I knew that it was of Serûji growth, and I tarried not in hastening back to the Khân, giving myself the rein, to test the truth of my surmise and whether my arrow had hit the mark in its divining. And, for sooth, I proved an expert in sharpness of sagacity, for Abû Zayd was sitting in the courtyard of the Khân. Then we con­gratulated each other on the meeting, and mutually paid the dues of the welcoming of friends. Whereupon he said: “What is it that befell thee, so that thou didst quit thy place?”—Said I: “Fortune broke and oppression was rife.”—He replied: “By Him who sends down the rain from the clouds, and makes come forth the fruit from its sheath, times are foul and iniquity [wrong] prevails on all sides, and the helper is not to be found, but Allah is the One besought for help. How then gottest thou away and which of the twain was thy state when thou wentest off?”—Said I: “I made night my shirt and set out early in it, a starve­ling.”—Then he pricked holes in the ground with his stick, and bethought him how to find a loan or procure a gift for me. Presently he stirred with the stirring of one to whom a prey comes near, or an opportunity presents itself, and said: “It just occurred to my heart that thou mightest ally thyself with one who heals thy wound and feathers thy wing.”—Said I: “How then am I to make union between the neck-ring and an empty purse, and who is it that will have Ẓull, son of Ẓull [Nobody, son of Nobody]?”—Then he said: “It is I, who shall drop hints of thee and for thee, and be proxy in and on thy behalf, besides that the people profess to set the broken bone, and to ransom the prisoner, and to hold in honour their kith and kin, and to consult the adviser; save that, if Ibrahîm, son of Adham, proposed to them, or Jebeleh, son of Ayham, they would not give in marriage unless for five hundred dirhems, in accordance with that which the Prophet, may Allah bless and hallow him, settled on his wives, or stipulated for the dowries of his daughters, with the proviso, that no portion should be claimed from thee, if thou wert driven to seek refuge in divorcement. Then I will deliver at the place of thy betrothal and at the gathering of thy wedding-guests an address such as has not opened an obstructed ear, and has not been pronounced the like of it in any assembly.” —Said Al Ḥârith, son of Hammâm: Now he roused my spirits more by the description of the address to be indited, than of the bride to be displayed, so that I said to him: “I entrust thee with the affair, so manage it with the management of him who is sharp-witted in the interest of him he loves.” Forthwith he rose, trot­ting away briskly, then returned beaming, and said: “Rejoice at the tidings of fortune, and the milking of an abundant flow. I have already been charged with fixing the contract, and stood security for the money, so the thing is all but settled. Thereupon he took to pledging all the people of the Khân [to be present at the appointed time], and to preparing sweet-meats for the table. Then when night had extended her tent-ropes, and every owner of a door had closed his door, he called out to the assembly: “Halloo! be present instantly,” and none of them lagged to obey his voice, and to enter his room. Now, when they stood in rows before him, and the witness and witnessed upon were gathered, he busied himself in raising the astrolabe and lowering it, and in consulting the almanack and laying it aside, until the people became drowsy, and sleep drew nigh. Said I to him: “Ho, Sirrah, put the axe to the block, and free the people from sleepiness.” Then he cast a glance at the stars, and breaking loose from the tie of silence, he swore by [mount] Ṭûr, and the written book, that the secret of this hidden matter should be unravelled and its memory spread forth unto the day of resurrection. Whereupon he sat in a kneeling position, and invited the ears to feed on his address, saying: “Praise be to Allah the king glorified with praise, the beloved Lord, the fashioner of every born one, the refuge of every outcast, the spreader of earth’s couch, the fastener of the mountains, the sender of rains, the smoother of difficulties, who knows all secrets and penetrates them, who overthrows kings and destroys them, who makes follow each other the ages in their turns, who initiates affairs and brings them to an issue.—His bounty is universal and perfect, His rain-cloud pours and showers, He answers request and hope, He makes it easy for the distressed and widowed.—I praise Him with the praise that endureth through all times, I proclaim His unity, as Abraham, the sorrowful, proclaimed it, for He is God, there is no God to the nations besides Him, there is none who inclines to that which would counterbalance or equal Him.—He sent Mohammed, a standard to Islâm, an Imâm to rulers, a fortifier of the lowly, an abolisher of the rights of Wadd and Suwâ, for he made known and taught, he restrained and established, he rooted firmly the principles of faith and propagated them, he confirmed promises and uttered threats.—May Allah never cease to bestow honour on him, and bring his spirit to the abode of peace, may he have compassion on his race and house, the noble, as long as a mirage glitters, as a young of the ostrich runs, as a new moon rises, as a shout that greets the same is heard.—Work ye, may Allah keep you, the best of works, and tread the paths of lawful­ness, throw ye off the forbidden, and abandon it, and listen to the command of Allah, and obey it; unite ye the blood-relations and revere them, and resist the lusts and repel them; ally ye yourselves to people of righteousness and piety; and cut yourselves off from the band of wantonness and greed.—Now the seeker of your alliance is the purest of freemen as to birth, and the noblest of them as to lordliness, the sweetest as for a watering-place, and the soundest as for keeping his word.—Behold he has come to you and alighted in your sanctuary to wed your bride, the honoured, and to settle a dowry upon her as the Prophet settled upon Umm Salamah;—and he is the worthiest of sons-in-law to whom children have been trusted and who was made possessed of what he desired,—he who gives to him in marriage is not hasty nor errs he, the one who enters with him in relationship is neither foiled nor soiled.—I ask from Allah for you to approve of his connection, and to prosper him lastingly, and may He inspire each one to seek improvement of his state and to make ready for his return. To Him be eternal praise, and glory to his Apostle Mohammed.” Now when he had ended his address, marvellous of disposition, void of punctuation, he concluded the marriage contract at the settlement of the five hundred, after which he said to me: “For ease and sons!”—Then he brought forth the sweet-meats which he had prepared and set going a feast to be remembered for aye. I advanced [stepped up] to them as the company advanced [stepped up] and was nigh to stretch out my hand towards them, but he scared me from eating and urged me to hand them round, when, lo, by Allah it was not in quicker time than the eyelids meet, that the people fell prone upon their chins. Then when I saw them like the roots of a falling date-tree, or like those thrown by the daughter of the wine-cask, I knew for sooth that it was an un­exampled mischief, and the mother of precedents. So I said to him: “O thou arch-fiend of thy own soul, and vile slave of thy coin, hast thou prepared for the people sweets, or a bane?”—Said he: “I have not gone beyond a mess of banj in trays of the Khalanj tree.”— Then I said: “I swear by Him who makes the stars rise in brightness and guides by them all wayfarers, thou hast done a hateful thing and secured thee a record amongst shameful deeds.” Thereupon I was be­wildered at thought of what would come of his affair, and with fear of infection from his scab, so that my soul fluttered within me distractedly, and my side-muscles quivered with fright. Then, when he saw the extent of my fear and the excessiveness of my anxiety, he said: “What is this burning thought and this white-hot fear? If thy concern at my offence is for the sake of me, know that I am now well off and gone, freeing this spot from my presence, and leaving it void of me, and how many like it have I quitted to remain deserted. But if it is with a view to thyself, and from apprehension of thy imprisonment, then partake of the remainder of the mess, and be contented to be without thy shirt, so as to be safe against the redresser and the seeker of redress, that thy stay after me may be tranquil. But if not, the flight! the flight! before thou be captured and dragged away.” Forthwith he proceeded to clear out whatever there was in the rooms of money-sacks and chests, and began to appropriate the selected part of everything stored, and the choicest of everything measured and weighed, so that he left that which his net spared, like a bone voided of its marrow. Then after he had bagged that which he had chosen, and tied it in bundles, and had tucked up his sleeves and girded himself, he accosted me as accosts one who has donned impudence, and arrayed himself with the garb of sincere friendship, saying: “Hast thou a mind to accompany me to the Baṭîḥah, so that I may wed thee to another fair one?”—Then I made oath to him by Him who had created him to be blessed wherever he might find himself, and not of those who commit felony in a Khân, that I had it not in me to marry two freeborn and to cohabit with twain rival wives, moreover said I to him in the language of one who humours his humour, and measures to him with his own bushel: “The first suffices me for a boast, so seek another one for the other.”—Then he smiled at my speech and stepped forward to embrace me, but I turned from him my cheek and showed him my repugnance. So when he saw my shrinking back, and my aversion became manifest to him, he indited: