[528] | 48 |
YES, I turned back. The way was hard to travel
Over the stormy sea and desolate land;
The sea was harbourless—ashore, my palfrey
Sank fetlock-deep into the yielding sand.
I asked for food in every mart I traversed;
Food was there none, but hunger and despair.
Long days I passed seeking the Living Water;
Khizra I found—the fountain was not there.
Ere this I sought the company of sages;
Not theirs the helpful voice that soothes and cheers.
Like Jacob I was lonely, robbed of Joseph,
Left to the barren solace of my tears.
Yet I live on, branded by Love and tortured,
Racked with a pain I can no more disguise;
My tears and wails betray me and my guarded
Secret is patent in my streaming eyes.
My birth-star doomed me to a life of trouble,
Else why should heaven pursue me with its curse?
God’s rain of mercy elsewhere sheds its blessing,
But I unworthy slide from worse to worse.
At last, worn out, weary beyond endurance,
I seek an anodyne to ease my pain.
World-guardian Thou, Ahmad Apostle, hear me;
Wide is the world, but wider is thy reign.